What Would I Tell My Children If I Knew I Didn't Have Long to Live?

What would I tell my children if I knew I didn't have long to live?
I've often wondered what lasting bits of advice could I leave my children that would make a difference in their lives, but just as importantly, the lives of others.

When I reached the age of 40, I began to notice a few things differently. I no longer could move and run as fast as I could before. Suddenly there were new aches and small pains I'd never had before and they seemed to last longer. Then a decade later, I found the aches and pains were becoming constant companions, relieved only for the duration of the over the counter medications I began to ingest. Time, truly had become my enemy. With that thought I began to realize my mortality was as real as anything else I'd ever experienced. I needed to do something(s) and I needed to do them in a hurry. Yes, I am no longer bullet proof!

I'd wanted to write for years. Now my opportunity seemed ever closer yet slipping away by the day. I needed to act now. So, here goes.

Live an honorable life.

Basically, think of it this way; Live your life so the preacher won't have to lie when he preaches your funeral. Do the right thing, every time you can. Go out of your way to make someone else have an easier time. The rewards will always be worth it.

Don't worry about who gets the credit.

Do what needs to be done, before hand whenever possible. Don't wait for others to ask, or even worse to tell you to do something you know needs to be done, if it is at all within your power. When you do it, try to be as inconspicuous and anonymous as possible. You'll come away with a healthier attitude knowing something others don't, and it's not necessary to share the information that you did it.

Learn everything you can about everything.

There's no substitute for education in any situation. I've come to understand that just because I have a college degree doesn't mean I really know much of anything. It looks good on a resume' but in reality life is an ongoing learning process. If you're not learning, you're back tracking. The old adage "what you don't use you lose" is more than apropos for just about every situation in life. When you don't know something, don't be afraid to ask, but when you ask, make sure you learn. Take notes if you need to. No one's going to fault you for making sure you understand and remember what someone else took the time to help you with.

Read.

Whatever your passion is, read about it. Stay current. Even if it's ancient history, you may become an expert on a subject, but you'll never know it all and the only way to continue to learn is to read everything you can on the subject of your interests. Don't limit yourself to this one area. Read things that you're not even really interested in. You may come away with a different perspective, or better understand why you feel the way you do about that particular subject.

Listen.

There is a reason God created human beings with two ears and only one mouth. We have twice the capacity to hear and understand that which is presented to us. When you're talking, you're expressing your opinion about something you may or may not fully understand. Abraham Lincoln once said something to the effect that "it's better to remain silent and be considered a fool, than to speak, just once, and forever remove all doubt". Have you ever noticed when you sing along with the radio, you're not really enhancing the song? There's nothing wrong with expressing yourself through song, but if you're so great, why are the recording artists the one's receiving the royalty checks and you're the one singing off key? (If you don't believe me, the next time you're going to "sing along" cover just one ear and listen to yourself, to see if you can carry the key and pitch as perfectly as the professional).

Never forget where you came from.

You may have come from humble beginnings and climbed the ladders of success to a status others can't even imagine, but the heights you reach could've only been obtained while you stood on the broad shoulders of someone who had the strength, and more importantly, grace to allow you there, while they remained the silent and most often unpaid supporter of your dream. Your family may be your heritage, but what you become will always be a direct reflection of a relation who loved you when you were oft times unlovable and unable to see your own faults.

Give until it hurts and then give a little more.

If you look at any American coinage or paper money you will, thankfully, still find the words "In God We Trust" engraved or printed on each denomination. If this is true, and I whole heartedly believe it to be so, then no matter how long, and hard, you worked for this money it's not really yours anyway and if you truly trust in God with and for this money, it must belong to Him! You are only a temporary steward of the money and you have the controlling power to use it wisely. If you don't, you won't have it long. How many times have you purchased something, or just blown your money, and shortly after in a time of real need regretted your philandering? Give the money to those who are in need and make sure you don't short them in your giving. If you hold a dollar in a clenched fist, refusing to let it go, God can't fill your palm with another dollar because there is no opening to receive anything else. Money can be a powerful thing but only if used wisely. You don't give to get, you get to give.

Send an occasional hand written letter of encouragement.

If you've had someone on your mind stop and send them a quick note letting them know of your appreciation for their friendship. I've found there's usually a reason you've been thinking about them and they'll appreciate the support.

Support our country's military men and women.

Even if you don't support a current military action, remember there are men and women from every corner of society, living on wages comparative to poverty, who literally fight and die every day for you to enjoy the freedom of our great country. These are individuals who were not forced into action, but signed willing on the dotted line to protect and defend our country, the constitution and every person within the confines of the United States of America. You owe them - big time! Shake their hand when you see them in uniform in public. Tell them you appreciate the sacrifices of family, time and all too often life. Be genuine in doing so. They deserve it and so much more.

Get involved.

If you don't like the way things are going in our country, you're of voting age now, do something about it. Go to the polls and let your voice be heard. Become active in your community. I once heard of a man who went down and had 8X10 color photos of himself taken, printed and mailed to his congressman with an attachment introducing himself. In his letter he then proceeded to remind the congressman that he, the congressman, worked for him, the citizen. I think that needs to be done a lot more often and with more force. Regarding American politics, I've never seen an eagle that could soar on one wing. By that I mean it takes the genuine heart felt application of both parties working together, for the good of the greater cause. No one person, nor party has all the right answers. But if you don't become involved at some level you're bound to accept what our "leaders" give you. If you're going to be led, at least have a say so in who you're leader is and where you want to go.

Too much to say in one missive, but the intentions of my heart are pure and whole. Learn from great quotations and hold them in your heart and mind. I could quote you scripture, chapter and verse, but at times like these the heart of a father must be heard and understood for what it feels, knows and sees to ensure the success of his children in the days to come.
I love you,
Dad

Dreams left and lost by the side of the road

Some time ago I was driving down the expressway and as I took my usual exit I noticed something up ahead just off to the side of the road. As I came closer I saw it was a small, inexpensive looking "jewelry" box which had once been in the shape of a wooden treasure chest. It appeared to have fallen from someone's vehicle and most of its contents were strewn in a careless pattern all around it. As I was in a hurry, to go no where of significance, I passed it off as someone else's misfortune and never stopped to see if there was any type of identification which should allow it to be returned to its rightful owner. That was strike number one. The next day, I passed the same scene but it looked a little worse for the wear, having been out in the elements along side a busy high way, but, again, I was too busy to stop. Strike two. Finally after several days of coming and going, I no longer noticed the box and its contents. Eventually it was gone. Strike three, I'm out!
I didn't care about possessing the contents, regardless of how valuable any one of the trinkets might have actually been. They really didn't appear to have much significant value, and in my quick glances I continued to shrug them off as mere worthlessness on the side of the road. But there's something about this little box that I can't get off my mind. I'm guessing it probably belonged to some young woman who had collected each item, a piece at a time, as gifts or perhaps "investments". When they adorned the owner's ear lobes, neck, wrists or fingers they created an illusion of grandeur, or a step up above and out of the ordinary. In other words they transported the owner to a temporary land of dreams where she, no doubt, felt important, accepted, noticed and in the end perhaps valued and loved because of something she possessed and the way she enhanced herself.
Too often, now, I wonder how many times I've passed similar opportunities in life and never stopped to help someone, such as in the Biblical story of the good Samaritan? (Luke 10:30-37)
The treasure chest, in my scenario, represents the possessions or dreams of the "certain man" or probably young woman in this case. I, unfortunately, became as the priest who first saw the dreams, but didn't bother to pursue them on behalf of the dispossessed. Next time, I became as the Levite, when I slowed down, and took a closer look, but once again did nothing and passed on by. Finally, as in the Biblical passage, an unknown person(s) came by and the treasure chest of hopes and dreams was picked up and taken away. Perhaps my analogy is not in perfect keeping with the scripture, but my intent is to show a missed opportunity for service in anonymity.
Did you ever notice that in the 8 verses telling this story, in the Bible, not once is a single name given? At least 2 of the 4 people mentioned are Jews, or "religious people", who would normally be thought of as ready, willing and able to give help and support to a wounded person. Ironically, the Bible says the wounded person was "stripped of his raiment, wounded and left half dead" by the side of the road. Without his clothing, he became unidentifiable. Today we couldn't tell if he, or she, was a banker because his Armani suit and Rolex was missing. Could he, or she, have been a doctor or nurse? Who knows, without their scrubs and missing stethoscopes? Perhaps a professional pilot, now missing the dark uniform with its impressive stripes upon the sleeves. All items of identification. All missing; hence leaving the person unidentifiable, half dead and worst of all, alone.
The Middle Eastern area in which this account takes place is one between Jerusalem and Jericho. This is a 17 mile distance noted as a treacherous"short cut" trade route between the two cities. (Ironically, that's about the same distance I was traveling) The wounded man was more than likely carrying an assortment of goods to be traded and/or sold in the markets of Jericho. Now, he was penniless, near death and naked. Without a dream, how often have I found myself feeling much the same as this man?
But an anonymous benefactor showed up on the scene and cared for this wounded individual, binding up his wounds, (gathering up what's left of value in his life), pouring in oil and wine, (the oil being a healing balm and the wine an antiseptic), providing him safe transportation and caring for him. He gave the wounded, unidentifiable man hope. Perhaps the dreams and possessions originally lost to the thieves were gone for ever, but at least there was hope and more importantly the benefactor promised to return to repay the inn keeper for anything needed above and beyond in the care of the wounded man.
Isn't it interesting that the benefactor, is anonymous. He knows who he is. He knows he has wealth, as he immediately paid the inn keeper in advance with a promise for full restitution of anything else needed. He had power, because he told the inn keeper "take care of him." But, still he remains anonymous. I like it. When we know who we are, it's unimportant that anyone else know our names. When we identify with the One "from whom all blessings flow" our providence is as assured as was the wounded man, and in the end our dreams are not really left and lost by the side of the road, but actually replaced with newer more important and certainly more valuable experiences because of the generosity of One who cared more for us and our futures.
Hopefully, the owner of the missing treasure chest styled jewelry box has by now started recollecting more valuable items - stars in her crown...

Destiny

Before you ever took your first breath, outside of your mother's womb, Destiny was anxiously awaiting your arrival. Silently pacing back and forth in an out of the way area so as not to interfere with your birth, it listened for your cry, indicating the race had begun. The interesting part about all this remains that destiny is not merely a final place to be attained, but an all inclusive journey encompassing everyone and everything you experience in life.

Ah, life! That little four letter word, so easily dispatched to the realm of insignificance because it's too often over loaded with the details of every day existence. When simplicity reigns in my day to day function, then I am really living, and becoming involved in my destiny.

Because I believe in the one true living God, I don't believe the grave is my ultimate destiny. Rather, a small piece of real estate leased, somewhat expensively, for an experience, otherwise known as time. If those left behind deem it fitting, there may be a tomb stone placed at the head of my temporary investment which will merely state my name and the date of my birth followed by the date of my passing divided by a small dash in between. It's the dash in between that really tells the whole story of the relationship with my God and my destiny. He is where I'm going. Destiny is how I got there. Others will be left to tell my story. That's where character comes into play. You see, my reputation is what those left behind will tell of me to each other. My character, i.e. that which I became because of my experiences with destiny on my journey, is what the angels will present to God, on my behalf. Big difference.

Who knows, just by reading this, you may decide to become a part in my destiny - I invite you to come aboard and sail with me. It's easy to admire the beauty of the vessel while it's moored in the safety of the harbor, but then again, ships weren't built for the harbor, they were built for the seas of life. (There's that little four letter word again.)

Jeremiah 29:11

Let's talk about Christmas...

When I take hold of my "Black Backed Book" and stop to take a good look at the "Christmas" story, recorded in the New Testament, I come away with a whole new way of looking at things. I mean, did you ever stop to think about it?

Gabriel, the angel of annunciation, (that's hi fallutin' religious talk for a big fella that gets your attention right away because he works directly for God and tells it like it is) first went to a lady named Elisabeth, cousin to Mary the Mother of Jesus. Then he flies on down the road to give Mary the "Good News". Now all this would be fine, well and good if we left it right there, but this is where it starts to get good! Although the Bible doesn't name him specifically the next time, he goes to my favorites - "the shepherds in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night".

Taking just a pinch of spiritual license here, I'd like to call these old boys the first "farmers, ranchers and/or cowboys". Who else but a bonifide country boy would recognize the importance of "working the midnight shift" with a bunch of dumb animals because the sheep were innocent, and didn't understand "the dangers of the night". But the message of moment, the heralding of the hour, the clarion call of the Creator came first to the simple farmers of the territory. Ah, the profundity of simplicity!

They immediately went to see where the King of Kings lay wrapped up in a feed trough, in back of what became known as the first "Holiday Inn". It wasn't until sometime later when the "wise men" showed up, but that's another part of the story.

And, have you ever wondered about "the star"? I believe it was one, set apart from the creation at the beginning of time, put on a shelf in the store room of Heaven waiting for this exact moment. In the back of my mind I can see God, looking through His blue prints and when everything else was in place, He says, "Oh yeah, go back there and get Me that special Bethlehem star. Bring it to Me right away. I've got a job for it to do". Can you imagine the excitement of the star after having waited from the beginning of creation until now in the dark and dusty resources of "the back room"? Now it gets to shine with a brightness and intensity no other star has ever equalled. It was a one time "gig" but it made history and we're still talking about it today.

Speaking of Bethlehem, did you know that it translates from the Hebrew into the English meaning, "the house of bread"? Irony strikes the cold steel anvil of truth once again when it dawned on me that the babe that lay in the feed trough, was also the one who would feed not only 5000 men (not counting women and children) with 2 fish and 5 loaves, but all humanity with His broken body just 33 years later!

Man, this is gettin' deep and I've got some more thinkin' to do on this subject...the question is, "what do you think about it all"?

The Night Before Christmas

Carlton E. Wertz, 111


Twas the night before Christmas
And out on the range
It was quiet and peaceful
Seemingly strange

The stock were all corralled
And bedded down well
And up at the house
Mom's cookies I smelled

Everything was right
For a change in a while
When I gazed up to heaven
And started to smile

You see, tomorrow's His birthday
And traditions we'll keep
Of family with friends
And good things to eat

But tonight it's just me
And the Lord all alone
Just out here a talking
About things He has done

For me and my family
Our friends and unknowns
Those He's so close to
And them all alone

We take all the credit
For the good things in life
Then stop to pray wonderin'
Why He'd let something slip by

Forgetting the blessings
Of everyday life
Like honest work for a living
My kids and my wife

But to stop and to thank Him
For everything due
Would take more time
Than I'm alloted it's true

So I strode off a good ways
Silver Belly in hand
Pointed to the Heavens
And gave my command

"Angels and beings
Within earshot of my voice
Tonight before I leave here
You're all to rejoice

For the Creator of Kings
And the Giver of Life
Has a birthday tomorrow
Now let's do it up right!

Gold, Myrrh and Frankincense are fine
But He's due some gifts
More up to the times

A symphony of praise
From coyotes in the brush
And the comin' of sun up
Will cause 'em to hush

Which will lead to the cooing
Of the brown mournin' dove
Causing all of creation
To once again look above

And the elements in
Their most festive attire
Will bring on the dawn
With a gold ball of fire
More beautiful presents
Money cannot aquire

So, until that tomorrow
I stand here at a loss
After all I just came out here to say
Happy Birthday - Boss!